Wind is Evil

***WARNING: This post contains a certain amount of hyperbole. I assure you, however, that this is the most important hyperbole in the world, ever.

As many of you may know, I am not a big fan of wind. Or to be hyperbolic: I HATE WIND!!!!!!!! I am convinced that all wind blows straight up out of the very depths of Hades.

I should make an important distinction at this point. There is a difference between wind and a nice breeze. Breezes are sent by God to refresh the air, cool our bodies, and rustle the leaves. However, if the air is moving at a speed greater than that which is necessary to accomplish these tasks or others like it, then it is wind.
And wind is bad/my least favorite weather element/a great cause of unceasing frustration.

Yesterday I encountered wind here in California for the first time. I rode my bike in it. It is also teaming up with fire to try and burn down houses north of LA. Fire is bad sometimes, but it gets together with wind it is bad news. Wind brings out the very worst in fires. There are many firemen right now who hate wind even more than I do.

Wind makes any other weather element worse. Rain is OK, but if it is blown by wind it is worse. Snow is OK, but wind makes it into a blizzard. Wind makes the cold colder and the hot more like a blow dryer. Tornadoes and hurricanes are wind.
Wind blows dirt into my eyes, papers off my desk, and debris into the road.
Wind does so much more than I can write about here so I have decided to start a list, found to the right, of all the negatives of wind.